In relationships, we get support, understanding, learn to resolve conflicts, and find compromises. Generally, we grow and develop. Communication with our partners helps us better understand ourselves. This communication helps heal our childhood wounds. Our partners become more than just humans for us. You share your time, money, and whole life with him or her. With partners, we have common goals and ideas. We value the image of the family we managed to create. Even when the problems appear, we usually try to solve them as fast as possible to avoid damaging relations.
Unfortunately, sometimes you have no other choice but to break up with your girlfriend. There can be many different reasons for this. And you must know that there is always something that holds you back from leaving even if your relationships seem to be over. Leaving is a very hard process because humans tend to doubt their feelings. You start evaluating things and think that even though you lost your connection and can’t have a normal dialogue in your relations anymore, she still cooks for you. Maybe it is all not that bad at all. Remember, if you started to ask yourself whether you want to leave your relationship, then chances are high that you should leave. Doubts can never bring you joy and make you happy. This is not the end of your life, and there are many girls looking for dates out there. The longer you stay in a bad relationship, the more it damages your emotional conditions.
Signs You Need to Break Up
Human relations is a very hard thing. Mostly because you can never be sure what is right there. You have your opinion, she has hers, and you clash your opinions like on the battlefield. But why don’t you leave? You have spent a lot of time together and have so many things in common. Plus, there is always hope that your partner will change at some point. Some people are afraid of this because they have no idea how to deal with a break-up. As you see, this is a very complicated process, but there are signs that you definitely should leave. To make things clear when it is better to break up, we have made the list of signs for you.
Your partner disrespects you
Respect is very important in your relationships. You can’t normally live with someone who doesn’t respect you or if you don’t respect them. And if your partner doesn’t respect you anymore, then this means that you have a huge problem in your relationships. Try to talk to him or her and find out what has happened. Maybe your partner is just angry with you. It is always nice to know for sure.
Your partner lies to you
Remember, lies can never be tolerated. If you see that your partner lies to you, especially if they lie about places where they have been and who did they meet. There is no place for lies in healthy relationships. This is a clear sign that one of you is tired of your relationships. If your partner lied only once to you, then you may consider forgiving him or her. But if he or she lies you all the time, then you should leave this person.
You feel controlled
There is a big gap between taking care and controlling people. Care is always pleasant, it is nice, when he or she takes part in your life, wants to help you, and wants to be useful for you. But the situation is out of control when your partner becomes overprotective or, which is even worse, starts to control your life completely. He or she may take control over your money, may try to forbid you to be friends with whom he or she doesn’t like. You should run away from a person like that.
You don't want intimacy
Human life is a very complicated thing. We can only be happy when we can satisfy our basic needs and emotional wishes. Intimacy is one of those wishes. And if you don’t want intimacy with your partner, then you should do something about it. If your partner satisfies you in every other way, and you don’t want to leave him or her, then you need to talk about this problem. Otherwise, it is better to find someone else. Nowadays, it is rather easy to meet single ladies.
Your fights become too aggressive and toxic
It is normal to argue. No matter how badly you love your partner, you need those arguments in your life. But one thing when you argued about something, and in an hour you do something together completely skipping your previous contradictions. Another thing is when your arguments last for days and deeply insult you or your partner. In this case, you should consider breaking up with your partner.
You simply feel unhappy
General happiness is a crucial factor. There are hundreds of reasons why you may or may not feel happy with someone. We are not going to list all those factors here, but there is a simple general rule. If you are not happy with your life, then do something about it. If for whatever reason, you are not happy with your partner, and there is nothing you both can do about it, then it is better to break up.
How to Break up with Your Girlfriend Nicely
The time has come for you to break up with your girlfriend, but how to do this properly? This is no going to be easy. You have spent so much time together, and now you begin a whole new era in your lives. But you must understand, no matter how hard and painful it is, it will be way harder and much more painful if you decide to prolong your bad relationships. Prepare to have a very hard week in your life. We are going to provide you with 4 steps that will help you break up with your girlfriend nicely. Take your time to read it attentively.
1. Make sure that you are not going to change your decision
When you have unsolvable problems in your relationships, it is up to you leave or stay. There is no middle ground. No one respects people who decide to break up today, but tomorrow ask to forgive them and be together again. Carefully analyze all the pros and cons to make your decision. If you still don’t feel sure about it, then you should know that both of you will pay for your uncertainty with pain and nerves. Take your chance to make the right decision and start acting immediately after you have decided.
2. Begin with a “hard” conversation
Firstly, remember, it is always better to save friendly relations with your ex-girlfriend after your breakup. This is why no matter how hard it will be, you must talk to her and tell her why you want to break up with her. You both may start to cry during this conversation. Occasionally, this even saves relationships because people manage to solve their problems at this critical point. But don’t expect this to happen in your case. Your goal here is to explain to her that you don’t hate her, and have nothing against her, but you are not happy anymore in your relationships, and this is why you are going to leave.
3. Don’t stay together
You decided to break up, but you had already bought a house together, and none of you have any idea where to go because you can’t sell your house immediately. Yes, this is a big problem. But you must understand that the longer it takes for you to leave your ex-relationship, the harder it will be and longer it will take for you to start something new. You may try to have an agreement that one of you will rent an apartment or house. And in the future, you will compensate your partner's when your house will finally be sold.
4. Don’t call her
Remember, you have a separate life now. Even if you broke up at normal conditions, you should still remember that she is not your friend. It is normal if you call or text each other once a month to find out is everything alright there. But you just can’t call or text her every day. It just looks very strange. If you need each other so badly, then why did you break up in the first place? If she calls or texts you too often, then it is better to ignore her at all. You can answer once a month, and this will be fine. Again, after your breakup, you need to build new relationships, and there is no reason for you to stay in the past.
Tips to Help You Get Over a Breakup
It is very rare when two people can easily break up with each other. Usually, breakups hurt a lot. This is the reason why so many people all around the world have no idea how to get over a breakup. Well, this is all highly personal. But their general tips that may help you get over this situation without suffering too much. Read our list of tips and no-noes to know how to survive your breakup.
1. Alcohol can’t help you
Remember, maybe alcohol looks like a very good idea at first glance. But it is not. It can’t help you at all. Alcohol never solves problems but creates them. It is like a wildfire that burns your life down. Your heart is burning after your breakup, and there is no reason to add more fire into your emotions. It is fine if you share a beer or two with your friends, but make sure that you don’t do it regularly.
2. Find a new hobby
The fewer things in your life remind you about your old relationships, the faster you will recover. Almost everything can serve you as a hobby. Maybe you were used to something in your childhood but had to forget about this because of a certain reason. So getting over someone is the best time for you to get back to your old interests.
3. Spend time with your friends
Maybe before the breakup, you liked to be alone. But now loneliness is your enemy. Tell your friends that you need their attention now more than ever. Try to hang out with them as much as possible. Invite them to your place to play on your Xbox, or you may go somewhere. If you can go on a vacation, then you definitely should do this. Don’t be shy to call your friends if you start to feel lonely.
4. Do something for yourself
I know that you are not used to doing anything only for yourself. And it is nice and normal, but now it is the best time for you to be just a little selfish. If you have been dreaming about something for a long time, but you couldn’t afford to have it before, then now you should go and get it just right now. It can be a new pair of tires for your car or set of tools, or maybe a top-line audio system for your house, just go and get it. Visit your favorite rock band concert. Generally, you should take some time to live for yourself.
5. Go to a gym
After the breakup, you are full of bad energy. Yes, you may feel that you have lost all your strength, but your body is fooling you. It doesn’t work that way. The more you achieve, the more energy you have for your next achievements. Why don’t you start with a gym? Usually, men tend to gain more fat when they are in relationships. Now it is the perfect time to make your body perfect again. Plus, it will make you healthier. Just don’t kill yourself there.
6. Set a new goal
Getting over a breakup is hard and it may affect your health. But why should you stop on your body? Set yourself some serious goals. Your breakup didn’t stop your life, and you don’t have to stop too. Humans live while they want and try to achieve something. Think about your wishes, then make a plan and follow it step by step. Remember, you are the owner of your future.
7. Forgive and let it go if your partner left you
After the breakup, you should not pursue your ex-girlfriend, and don't try to find out which of the two of you is to blame. Keep your dignity, and don’t forget about pride. Don’t try to avenge the offense inflicted on you or you will let your former lover understand that he or she is right in their decision to leave you. It is better to leave the relations that ended in the past. Consider your bad experiences a stage of development on the path to a better life.
We hope that now you know how to break up with someone you love. And, which is more important how to know when to break up. Breaking up is never easy, but there are many ways how you can get over a breakup. Don’t fool yourself with the hope that you may be together again after breaking up. No one leaves without a reason. And if you were the one who initiated the breakup, then you definitely should forget about your ex-partner. Chances that he or she has changed since your breakup are incredibly low. As we said before, you must look into the future and not in your past. Let your past go once and for all.