There are different situations in life, especially in terms of dating. As a rule, a man takes the initiative, gets acquainted with a lady and starts a relationship if they like each other. But sometimes there is an opposite situation. A girl likes a man, but she doesn’t interest him in any way. Therefore, he asks himself: how to say no to a date nicely? Actually, in such a situation, a man can refuse as he wants. The main thing is that he shouldn’t offend a girl. And here are some ways how to do it right.
How to politely say no to a date
You communicate with a girl and you are satisfied with a friendly relationship. But here she offers you to meet or asks you out. This, of course, is great, but not every guy likes when the initiative is not shown by him. If a girl hurries events and admits that she wants to go with you to the cafe, making unambiguous hints at the seriousness of her intentions, you need to know how to nicely say no to a date so as not to spoil friendly relations with her. So, what to do?
Don’t be too strict
If you don’t accept such a development of events, don’t cut it out. A girl is just self-confident, independent and shows her attraction asking you out. This doesn’t mean that she doubts that you are capable of the first step. Just let her take the initiative and then you can do what you think is right.
Be as sensitive as possible
If she is important to you, try to let her know as sensibly and kindly as possible that you can’t have anything with her, at least for now. Perhaps, you will change your decision in the future. But you definitely will not be accepted with all her heart if you say no to a date in a rude way.
Even if you don’t like a girl, don’t tell the truth
To refuse the girl politely so that she doesn’t take offense, you shouldn’t tell her that she is not your type, that you just don’t see in her that unique and incomparable one, etc. It is better to be polite as much as possible, but at the same time, you should be adamant. Convince a girl that your relationship with her at this stage is quite satisfactory and you don’t need such serious changes now. Of course, you should sound the reason for your words to have the right effect.
Tell a girl the reason for your refusal
Don’t be nervous if a girl persistently asks you to meet and tries to persuade. Tell her that you can’t be together because you love another girl (and this girl doesn’t feel the same) and you need time to get back to normal, move away from unrequited love. Or you can respond to the invitation in a different way, for example, saying that you are too busy with work/studying to start a relationship.
The next point of how to say no to a date nicely is your self-confidence. You shouldn’t mumble trying to come up with what to answer a girl. Be confident, speak quickly and clearly Also, it is advisable to prepare approximate phrases or expressions in advance so as not to make unnecessary pauses. Then you can delicately refuse a date and a serious relationship.
If everything above doesn’t help, then try the plan B. You can behave as if nothing had happened and react in no way to her manifestations of love. Over time, she may understand that you are indifferent to her and will cool down. However, she may lead you to a frank conversation and confess her feelings. And then you will still have to explain everything to her.
If a girl is too confident in herself or just crazy and you can’t get rid of her, you need to tell her clearly and confidently that you are completely indifferent to her and your opinion about her will never change. That is all. And then – just ignore her. She can try to do something for a while, but she will understand that you are rude or that she really has no chances. And, after all, she will calm down.
How to say no to a second date
When you start dating, you have a great opportunity to meet new, lonely people. The idea of how to nicely say no to a second date, for sure, doesn’t even come to your mind. But what if you don’t like her or she is simply not the person you want to see next to you? As soon as the first date is coming to an end, the question of the second meeting is likely to arise. So, you need to think carefully how to nicely say no to a date if you don’t have the desire to see this person again, but you don’t want to hurt her feelings either. This is what you need to learn as soon as you start dating: not every person you meet in your life will suit you. You have to be ready for it and know how to correctly say no to a second date before everything goes wrong.
If you don’t want a second date, you should sincerely say so. By agreeing to a second date, knowing that you don’t want to continue it, you are actually just delaying the inevitable. You will still have to tell the truth. But the longer you delay it, the more difficult it will be to do this.
Never make assumptions
It is easy to assume that you will hurt a girl by rejecting her. If a date doesn’t go well, in any case, there is a possibility that your friend doesn’t like it either. Most likely, she worries no less than you, thinking how to say no to a date after saying yes.
Adhere to a friendly tone
You can’t leave behind the feeling of understatement, but there is no need to speak rudely. Explain that you can no longer be with this person for certain reasons and call them. Politely tell a girl that you were pleased to meet her, thank her for coming, but also say that you don’t see a joint future for certain reasons. Wish her all the best. There is no need to go into details why you think that you don’t fit together. Let the information be vague, don’t worry. The main thing is not to be rude.
Tell a girl honestly and openly why you consider her a good person and what of her qualities you appreciate. Say that due to such qualities, she will certainly be able to find a suitable man.
Be kind. Try to treat her questions and claims with understanding (after all, you upset a person, she should know about the reasons that prompted you to this decision). Behave cleverly and intelligently. You are a good man and can talk with people, right?
Offer to remain friends
Of course, most of the girls are just annoyed with this offer and they almost never accept it, but you can make a step of goodwill. It will help prevent any hostility in the future. You are adults and quite capable of neutrality, especially if there was something between you.
Write a message
If you really can’t tell her about it and just don’t want to see her again, write a short message after a first date, thanking her for a good time and explaining that it doesn’t seem to you that you match and wish her all the best.
It is always necessary to be sincere because anything can go wrong if you lose control over the situation. It is better to know how to say no to a second date than continue a relationship that leads to nowhere from the very beginning.
How to say no to a date: examples
So, how to say no to a date in different life situations?
If something happened, but still, you want to meet again:
- Call as soon as possible. Say that you can’t come today. It will be very impolite if you just ignore it.
- Explain the reason to her. The best way is to tell the truth: you’re tired, don’t feel well, you were urgently called out to work. Don’t forget to add that you are very sorry and you want to meet with her as soon as everything becomes okay.
- Offer a possible date for the next meeting. For example: “I’m free next Friday. And what are your plans for this day?
- If a woman calls back later and asks how you feel, be sure to answer her and thank for caring.
If you decided not to see this woman anymore:
- In this case, it is also better to call, as soon as possible. It is much easier to cancel a date on the phone than to go on a date and spend an evening in the company of someone you don’t like.
- Think up a plausible excuse. For example, you are very busy at work. Or implausible – you are suddenly sent on a business trip for six months.
- But it’s better to tell the truth that you don’t want to continue a relationship. If you are afraid to hurt her feelings, soften the rejection, for example: “You are a nice girl, but I have a difficult period, and I don’t want to date anyone.”
- Unlike the first case, don’t say such phrases as “possible”, “next time” or “I’m very sorry”. This can lead a woman to the idea that she should be patient.
- The conversation should last exactly as long as necessary to inform her of the cancellation of the meeting and tell the reason for this. It is important not to make the impression that you are not sure of your decision.
Here some examples of how to say no to a second date by text:
- “I like to communicate with you, but we don’t fit together.”
- “I’m not ready for dates and relationships, I’m sorry.”
- “I’ve already found a girlfriend, sorry.”
- “I understood myself and realized that we are not a couple.”
- “I’m very pleased with your attention, but I want to say no to you. I, unfortunately, feel that our meetings will lead to nothing. You are very nice to me. Therefore, I don’t want to deceive you so I say everything directly, as it is.”
- “I was able to understand myself and my feelings and realized that we can’t be together. I can’t build a relationship with you. I’m not ready for it and I think you are not ready as well.”
- “Sorry, my tastes and priorities change, like everything in the world. I need to find myself without your help, I must end these meetings.”
- “I enjoyed spending time you, but now I want to live a real life and I can’t continue this. We had a good time. But I will no longer be able to respond to messages. Good Luck!”
- “I’m sorry, but now I’m in a situation where I need time to think.”
- “We need to take a break. I will not write to you anymore. I’m sorry if I offend you, but I really need it.”
Don’t try to stop a girl to write – it only warms up her interest! In order for an obsessive girl to stop writing, there are buttons “spam” and “add to the blacklist”. In many cases, just words don’t help. It is also necessary to realize that you are making the first step, so you need to do it resolutely. If you write that you can’t answer the messages anymore, then do it. Explaining the nuances and reasons, it will only exacerbate the situation – your communication will last for a long time, but it will only become very unpleasant.